my life in print
a breakdown….or a breakthrough?…..hmmmmmmm | October 5, 2009
So. Yesterday was not such a great day. Being completely on my own here has taken a bit of its toll, as any little thing is a chore. Going to buy a phone card to call home: disastrous. Catching a taxi to a gym supposedly everyone in the city is supposed to know of: um. Sure.(Question: How is it that since I’ve arrived, I’ve managed to find every single taxi driver in the city that knows absolutely NOTHING about Amman?!)
Let’s just say that all in all, yesterday I walked for probably more than two hours, fruitlessly, in attempts to find places that the most novice Arab speaker should be able to find. Alas, my name is Jacque. And I have the sense of direction of a dying flea. Thinking about starting a support group when I get home.
And today, while being a bit better, was when I finally had a bit of a release of cultural tension. It’s been really hard here walking alone as a girl, and an obvious Westerner. I feel incredibly safe, don’t get me wrong. It’s just that culturally, the men here seem to never grow in maturity past what a twelve year old would possess. So, walking down the street, men (gross, middle aged men) will stop their cars that are driving in the opposite direction of where you’re walking and back up to follow you, making ridiculous comments in Arabic. If you pass a group of men on the street, they will stare you down, make hissing noises, and in some cases make as if to follow you a few meters.
Today, I just was not in the mood. Walking from school in the direction of work after waiting for a taxi, a guy maybe about forty-five stopped and backed up, looking at me but not saying anything. AAAAAnnnd I completely lost my cool. Having learned the ever useful term for “donkey” (yes, same connotation as in the States) from Hanin, I walked up to his open window, flinging my arms open and shouting “aysh biddak, ya hemaar?! AYSHHHHHHH?!” [roughly translated to, “What do you want you donkey?! WHAAAAAAT?”
And you know what? I think I scared that little groucho. He rolled up his window, shaking his head with huge bobbly eyes, and drove off. Pretty sure that’s the best I’ve felt since I landed here…. Who says you have to be over 4’10 to be intimidating? HA!
**note to friends and family: I realize this was not the way to handle the situation. Alas.
4 Comments »
I think that was a great response! And there are a lot of American men who have not grown up past that kind of behavior either….one of my classmates (a 51 year old male) always shows up when we make the mistake of planning a girls luncheon or night out on Facebook. He makes crude comments…We’ve finally learned not to make our plans known on FB….but we’ve also come to the conclusion he still thinks he’s as great as he was in high school
Comment by Candy Ball — October 5, 2009 @ 7:02 pm
Jacque, I was in Lebanon this past summer and when I first got there, I was feeling kinda how you are now, a little frustrated, etc. with getting around and dealing with people. I also did notice the ogling of women as you are walking down the streets, as they would stare at my mom as we walked by. That pretty much shocked me and annoyed me as well. But I guess that’s the way they are there and for the most part, they don’t even realize what they are doing or mean any ill will. I remember one of the things I had the most difficulty with in the city was taking taxis because the driver often times won’t understand you or not know where/what you are talking about. I was nervous to take a taxi alone for a couple weeks, but eventually I realized the drivers don’t know that much and you have to point to where you want to go often times. I also got upset when I realized that since the driver knows you’re not a local, they’ll try to charge you extra, so you have to be stiff and clear with them. Anyway, I’m really impressed that you were brave enough to go to Jordan. Hope things improve for you, though I’m sure they will.
Comment by Karim — October 5, 2009 @ 8:31 pm
disagree with your last statement! of course this is is coming from the girl who once flipped off an egyptian police officer. alas, i too was having a bad day, he was totally asking for it, and it was (mainly? more or less?) unintentional…it that it literally took me a couple shocked seconds to realize what i was doing lol.
*sigh* i hope my mother doesn’t read this…
Comment by Ellen T. — October 6, 2009 @ 4:32 am
lol that’s my ducky!!!
Comment by renny — October 8, 2009 @ 2:37 pm